Dallas' Running Diary Padres V. Dodgers 9/22

I’m starting a little late on this diary because I just enjoyed some slices from Bronx Pizza. PEPPERONI WHITESTONE! Anyway, I started this diary just in time to hear the words, “Oscar Salazar steps up to the plate.” Hooray.

TOP OF THE 2^ND INNING:

• Salazar flies out. Whaaaaaa????
• Yorvit flies out.
• Ted Lilly is still pitching. Remember when he was on the Expos? A’s? Yankees? Cubs? Blue Jays? I do.

John Weisbarth is doing a Sonic Burgers commercial. How did this happen? I didn’t know he was even that famous with the channel 4 crowd to be doing ads. I mean HONESTLY WHO IS GOING TO GO TO SONIC NOW BECAUSE OF JOHN WEISBARTH?! I am.

BOTTOM OF THE 2^ND INNING:

• We’re having cable issues in the house.
• So far I’ve heard that The Cunster made an awesome catch. Cool. Cable back out.
• Phone call being made.
• Seriously if you don’t listen to the podcast you should. We spent about 20 minutes railing on how shitty COX Cable is. They are.
• Cable is back on. The Dodgers scored. I don’t know how.

END OF THE INNING: PADS - 0 COX CABLE - 1

TOP OF THE 3^RD INNING:

• Headley hits a single.
• Stauffer bunts him over.
• The Cunster up to bat and he stares at strike three.
• The Bobblehead Davey Eck hits a broken bat grounder to Furcal who short hops Loney which makes Eck safe, Headley running heads up scores the tying run while Loney then overthrows to A.J. Ellis at home moving Eck to 2^nd. Them’s the Padres I love!
• Oh son-of-a 90’s all-star! Tejada just hit a towering 2-run shot to left field!
• Referencing the losses of the Braves and Giants, Dick Enberg just said the players can see the scoreboard and they know what’s at stake. It sounded like he was assuming the players can’t read. I think Enberg half believes this.
• A-Gonz pops out.

BOTTOM OF THE 3^RD INNING:

• Stauffer is looking pretty solid for Stauffer. He’s looked good all year. Most people think he’s new. He’s not. He’s older than you think and honestly someone that should be washed up in a cellar bullpen by now. He is lucky the Padres like to give players 4 chances!
• Minus a single no harm done.

END OF THE INNING: PADS - 3 DOYERS - 1

TOP OF THE 4^TH INNING:

• Ludwick looks good sometimes and then not other times. I know that’s not insightful. I’m sorry. There is no other way to explain it.
• Salazar smacks a single to Furcal who misplays it. Lucky. 4^th chances…
• Yorvit drives a double off the wall. Salazar holds at 3^rd.
• Headley walks the bases loaded.
• Stauffer up and strikes out.
• The Cunster strikes out with the bases-loaded. That is not like him. Air. Sails. Out.

BOTTOM OF THE 4^TH INNING:

• The Cunster makes up for his strikeout by making a full layout forward dive to rob Loney of a base hit! Hang a star?
• Jay Gibbons? He’s still in the league? Is Jeff Conine still playing?
• Stauffer (or The Right Stauff as I’ve decided he should be called till he starts to suck.) strikes out Casey Blake so badly he immediately retires and goes back to his home town in Iowa to be the manager of the Clinton LumberKings!

END OF THE INNING: PADS - 3 DODGERS - 1

TOP OF THE 5^TH INNING:

• The Bobblehead pops out to the catcher.
• Tejada lines a grounder to Furcal who again can’t handle it and Tejada is safe. 3 for 3 baby! Three Men and a Baby?
• Hi. My name is Ryan Ludwick. I run hard? Oh, no you’re right I hardly run.

Corona’s new commercial has the tagline “Find Your Beach”, but I’ve never been somewhere without a beach when I saw someone drinking a Corona.

BOTTOM OF THE 5^TH INNING:

• The Right Stauff cruises and Eck makes a huge play.

END OF THE INNING: PADS - 3 DOYERS - 0

The Kept Faith podcast master, Travis Russell, is in attendance at Dodger Stadium tonight. It’s his first time there. I don’t know how he feels about it but I think that stadium is the worst in California. Yeah, it’s old and has history but the fans will kill you and every section is separated. Add the traffic and I’d rather watch a little league game in Fresno.

TOP OF THE 6^TH INNING:

• Salazar flies out. Uhhh….
• Yorvit strikes out.
• Headley strikes out.

Oh, did you know that COX has cable service? Thank you for the info COX commercial.

BOTTOM OF THE 6^TH INNING:

• Apparently Tommy Lasorda calls Dodger Stadium “Blue Heaven on Earth”. Dick Enberg just said Lasorda “pitched a couple of innings in the major leagues.” I love Enberg.
• The Right Stauff strikes out early Triple Crown contender Andre Ethier. By early I mean spring training.
• Kemp swings at strike three. I felt it in the living room! HD changes everything.

END OF THE INNING: PADS - 3 JOE TORRES - 1

TOP OF THE 7^TH INNING:

• Enberg: “Oh, the dreaded wave has hit Dodger Stadium.” Mark Grant: “With the amount of fans here tonight it looks more like an undertow.” Ha!
• Scott Hairston is out. Strange.
• The Cunster pops out.

Hey did you know that Mark Grant and Mark Neely often run into each other at San Diego County Credit Union? I believe it.

BOTTOM OF THE 7^TH INNING:

• I’m watching the game tonight at the Nick McCann Manor and were getting in a heated debate about the current Vincent Jackson situation. Nick is pissed about Jackson getting drunk and getting a DUI a day before a playoff game last season.
• I think Jackson made Philip Rivers. Nick thinks the opposite. We both agree Antonio Gates made them both.
• Really it’s Marcus McNeill we need back. Nick won’t stop talking about Jackson being a drunk. It’s funny. Alcoholism is funny.

END OF THE INNING: PADS - 3 DODGERS - 1

TOP OF THE 8^TH INNING:

• Listen, lets settle this debate by saying the most valuable Charger in the last decade is Darren Bennett.
• Ludwick gets on base! By getting hit by a pitch.
• T Gwynn JR grounds out.

Why do schools for graphic design have the worst commercial graphics?

I got distracted by a bunch of things - like Josh Beckett’s career and the state of my fantasy teams. I’m doing well this season though, thanks for asking.

TOP OF THE 9^TH INNING:

• Yorvit opens up the inning with a bloop single.
• Mark Grant just said of Matt Stairs, “that guy loves to swing that bat!” and I’ll add, “Mark Grant likes to bankrupt buffets!”
• Headley up. Out.
• Yorvit lazily steals second and gets thrown out. Well, that’s one way to do it.
• Stairs lines out.

BOTTOM OF THE 9^TH INNING:

• Heath Bell in for the Padres.
• Loney flies out.
• Kemp gets a little chin music. I’d love a Kemp and Bell fight. It would be the weirdest looking fight of all time.
• He walks Kemp with 4 high and inside pitches.
• Heath Bell strikes out Jay Gibbons? Is Kevin Elster still playing?
• Heath Bell makes Casey Blake look like my brother Casey and the PADRES ARE BACK IN FIRST PLACE!!!!

END OF GAME: PADS - 3 DOYERS - 1

I’m not sure what happened in LA. They seemed to have it all put together for a big run this year. Torre, ManRam, Kemp and Loney. It seemed like pure blue gold. Then like with all wealthy couples the McCourts had to ruin it. I’m trying to figure out how I can send a Thank You card to the happy couple, but so far all mine have been sent back. Things are looking up Padres fans! Let’s keep this momentum going and take the NL West. Who needs the wild card?

We might.